Being called fat isn’t nice, it is horrible in fact, but is it the worst thing that someone could call you?
After all people come in many different shapes and sizes so why do we cling to the notion that carrying a little extra weight is an insult and one that carries a huge weight?
Weight has always been something I have struggled with from a young age. School bullies name called and eventually it go to the point where I was name calling myself. This, in my opinion, is more damanging and toxic than the school bullies. Don’t get me wrong, the school bullies comments hurt and they hurt bad but the conversation you have with yourself day in, day out can be never ending and can lead to a much deeper routed problem.
When it comes to diets and weight loss, I’ve tried a good whack of them. From Weight Watchers, Slimming World to having a PT twice a week – which was eye wateringly expensive – to using My Fitness Pal to track calories in and out. Dieting and weight loss is a big business.
Before I go on, I completly understand the extent that being overweight can have on your health and wellbeing. I do however believe that someone shouldn’t be named called, talked down to or about because of how they appear. You wouldn’t comment on someones skin or gender, even their height (there are some unpleasant ones that would and do) but generally it isn’t something you would do so why is calling someone fat ok?
Recently I have been talking more openly with a counseller about different things from my past that have affected my self esteem. Heavy stuff. And one of the points that I brought up was being called fat by the afore mentioned school bullies and this turning into calling myself fat and losing value in myself. She said “but is being called fat really the worst thing?”
This got me thinking.
I’ve been at my “goal weight”, I’ve been way over what is considered a healthy weight for my height and at both ends I didn’t feel any happier or anymore ‘me’. There is a thought process that of “When I reach this stone that many pounds” I will be happy. I can wear what I like and life will be good. But it doesn’t work like that. Sure the confidence and excitement of being your “goal weight” will feel great for a while but if there is a deep routed problem of low self esteem, it will still be there until you address the issue in your mind.
When thinking about whether being called fat was really the worst thing I fought with different arguements. It isn’t nice for a start and people do judge based on how you look but if someone turned to me and told me I was homophobic, I would be hugely offended and angry because I am of the belief that you do you.
Words hurt and we are only human so of course being called fat will be a negative in your minds but I think we need to think about the bigger picture – I include myself in this, this is by no means preaching. It is difficult to not take it personally, not feel hurt by these comments but if this name calling happens I have decided to question it. “Is that the worst you have to say about me?” – to myself, to others.